On Needs and Wants
When I was young, I am fond of collecting TEX cards though I didn't get a chance to trade them with my neighbours. It was something I kept just to have something in my treasure box.
We were never rich and since I am also not so lucky to be blessed with presents, I had this fascination with toy trains. I asked my father if he could get me one but to no avail. I asked my aunt, who is also my godmother, but she doesn't have any money to buy me that expensive toy.
When I was in the university, I was fascinated by the sound of the piano and when I hear people playing it, I wanted to learn it as well. My cousin had a piano in their house and so in my spare time, I would ask my aunt if I could use their piano to practise some music pieces. My cousins loathed my presence in their house and I knew how much they despise me from using the instrument. So after some sessions, I surrendered since I am more onion- skinned than thick-skinned.
I left the country because I wanted to buy myself things that I cannot have. After some years, I actually rented a piano for two years and I gave myself the opportunity to learn some musical pieces on my own. I also bought three sets of trains with rails that goes up and down, fancier than ever.
From my own earnings, I got myself a number of material things. I was able to furnished my own pad with custom made furnitures and expensive decors. I was able to send money home to help out. I purchased a car, got myself a motorbike, and built a garden worth enjoying. I went on trips locally and internationally without any support from anyone.
In my life there were more wants than needs, I wanted these and I wanted those. I did not have the luxury to buy expensive things when I was young. My being a teacher is not a passport to accumulating wealth. My being all giving and stupid to requests made me vulnerable to failure.
For now, I look at my immediate needs and that would be a comfortable home, food on the table, money for emergencies, and an innate desire to live a peaceful and comfortable life. No more trains, no more expensive appliances and decors, no more long trips and unwanted ones. I am an awakened person. The attraction of having more and more is a thing of the past. The need to supply the needs is most pertinent.
We were never rich and since I am also not so lucky to be blessed with presents, I had this fascination with toy trains. I asked my father if he could get me one but to no avail. I asked my aunt, who is also my godmother, but she doesn't have any money to buy me that expensive toy.
When I was in the university, I was fascinated by the sound of the piano and when I hear people playing it, I wanted to learn it as well. My cousin had a piano in their house and so in my spare time, I would ask my aunt if I could use their piano to practise some music pieces. My cousins loathed my presence in their house and I knew how much they despise me from using the instrument. So after some sessions, I surrendered since I am more onion- skinned than thick-skinned.
I left the country because I wanted to buy myself things that I cannot have. After some years, I actually rented a piano for two years and I gave myself the opportunity to learn some musical pieces on my own. I also bought three sets of trains with rails that goes up and down, fancier than ever.
From my own earnings, I got myself a number of material things. I was able to furnished my own pad with custom made furnitures and expensive decors. I was able to send money home to help out. I purchased a car, got myself a motorbike, and built a garden worth enjoying. I went on trips locally and internationally without any support from anyone.
In my life there were more wants than needs, I wanted these and I wanted those. I did not have the luxury to buy expensive things when I was young. My being a teacher is not a passport to accumulating wealth. My being all giving and stupid to requests made me vulnerable to failure.
For now, I look at my immediate needs and that would be a comfortable home, food on the table, money for emergencies, and an innate desire to live a peaceful and comfortable life. No more trains, no more expensive appliances and decors, no more long trips and unwanted ones. I am an awakened person. The attraction of having more and more is a thing of the past. The need to supply the needs is most pertinent.
Comments
I have a dreamboard, on it, i post the material stuff i want.. the dslr, the macbook, and even a worldmap. And I think, I should put a picture of a car there as well. I got two out of the three as fruits of hardwork and labor, I still have to work on the map :) and since I will be adding the car, thats another thing.. hihihi....
But the most important thing is, we get to share these things and achievements with the people most important in our lives :D
Nowadays, my intention and advocacy are not for myself to be rich because teachers won't be. I am just going to use what I have to achieve some peace and contentment. Overall, the free things are still the best and wishing I get to have them on a regular basis. I know that these small things will make me happier as I am feeling down nowadays as friends are mostly gone.